That theme has been on my heart all day. It's so weird re-living the actual date, April 14th, of the worst day of your life. So far I've managed to sleep most of it away. It's been a dreary, cold day which in a way is nice. There is no hiding that Caleb's 3rd birthday season has hit me harder than I expected. But what I do know is that I woke up today and I could feel God's grace moving. Like a peace and comfort that just wash over me.
Another thought that keeps running in my head is something that Nathan said a lot during our pregnancy with Abigail-we end in victory. The enemy had won on April 14th, 2011 when death took Caleb like a theif in the night. But a year later, when we baptized Abigail Therese on April 14, 2012, we felt like we had won the war.
Backfired Again. End in Victory
Some scriptures that keep coming to mind today:
"Do not be overcome by evil, but instead overcome evil with good."Romans 12:21
"What you intended for evil, God intended for good."Genesis 50:20
"Oh death, where is your victory? Oh death, where is your sting? Death has been swallowed up in Victory"1 Corinthians 15:55-57
As we enter into Holy week, death is on my mind so much. But instead of feeling weighed down by death, like I have the last 6 weeks, I'm feel the power of overcoming death. Because each and every person who chooses to keep on living after whatever tragedy they face is kicking the enemy in the face. Satan's plans are death and destruction but like the preacher said, his plans often backfire.
I'm thankful for the grace we have been given to take Caleb's death and three years later be turning it into something positive. I can look back now over the past 3 years and say that Satan's plan did backfire. Instead of losing my faith in God, it somehow became stronger. Instead of running from Christ, I ran to Him. Instead of hardening my heart, it softened and filled with compassion and empathy.
We end in Victory, Backfired Again.
Ending this with two songs that are on repeat today. Clinging to hope even in the midst of death.