Sunday, August 12, 2012
Glad they dont understand
I was reading an article today here. I could relate. After spending time with another babyloss mom this week, she mentioned the same thing, "people just don't understand." And she is right, they don't. But there is such a big part of me that is glad they don't understand. Glad they never had to burry a child or leave the hospital empty handed. I have spent almost 16 months grieving the loss of my son and there have been plenty of times that I felt let down by others. Someone telling me to do this, or that this would help, or that I just have to move on. People saying things that hurt so bad without them even realizing it. And at first (ok, maybe for a while) I was upset. Frustrated that they didn't get it, that they couldn't understand. Mad that I was feeling let down by people closest to me. But then God helped me see that of course people will let me down. They are only human. Of course people cant understand. If they could- why would I need to go to God? There is a beauty in being "let down" with or "disappointed" by others while grieving. I think it helps us lean on God even more. So, like the article at the top says, I am glad others don't understand. It means 1)they haven't had to lose their child and 2) it helps me run to Jesus more and lean less on this world for comfort. It can be hard when others don't get it, but God always will. Sounds cheesy writing it, but its true. God understands my heart better than anyone and He is the ultimate healer. He has and always will "get it" and for that I am thankful.
Disclaimer- I dont mean to come off sounding like others have not helped me. They have! I have been helped so much by so many in the last 16 months, but there will always be a separation between those who really "get it" because they have been through it and those who have not.